Brothers in Blood
by Sathaeri
Summary: Alistair hates Loghain more than ever now that he's joined them. But he can no longer afford to run from the man who killed the Wardens... or the woman who is keeping him alive. A look into AU Dragon Age, where Alistair is a little less of a baby. R&R!
1. Duty and Desire

_**A/N:**__ Hi there! I'll admit I'm not that great at titling stories and chapters. I'll also admit that this chapter is a bit basic, with a lot of dialogue from the game (or at least as much as I can remember :D). I promise it'll get better... Disclaimer: I don't own Dragon Age or related characters. Maybe Aetheria and Soren, but that's it. Reviews greatly appreciated! :)_

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**Chapter 1: Duty And Desire**

_"I am justice. I am vengeance. Blood can only be repaid in blood."  
__- Lady Vasilia_

**~o~O~o~**

"I accept your surrender," Aetheria said, lowering her bloodied weapons.

Alistair felt outraged. "I did not just hear you say that," he fumed. "After all he's done? Kill him, already!"

"Wait!" interjected a rough voice. Alistair turned to see Riordan walk into the Landsmeet chamber. "There is another way." Alistair raised an eyebrow suspiciously. He didn't like the sound of it already.

"The general is a hero of great renown," the senior Warden said. "Let him be of use to us. Let him join the Grey Wardens."

Alistair's mouth fell open in shock. Aetheria furrowed her brow. "Would that even work?" she asked. "He isn't exactly loyal to us."

"We are what we are," Riordan replied. "The Joining binds us to the darkspawn, you know this. If you were to forswear your oath and flee today, you'd find yourself in the Deep Roads, given time." He glanced around before continuing. "Either you'd seek them out, or they'd seek you."

"The Joining itself is often fatal, is it not?" Anora added. "If he survives, you gain a general. If not, you have your revenge. Doesn't that satisfy you?"

Alistair couldn't hold his rage in any longer. "Absolutely not!" he shouted angrily. "Riordan, this man abandoned our brothers, then blamed us for the deed. He hunted us down like animals. He tortured you! How can we let him join us?"

"Riordan has a point, though," said Aetheria after a short pause. "We should let him go through the Joining."

"What?" Alistair scoffed angrily. "Joining the Wardens is an honor, not a punishment. I will _not _stand next to him as a brother, I won't!"

"And if I do let him join us?" she asked, looking him in the eye.

"Then I can't do it," he said firmly. "I'm leaving."

"No!" she suddenly yelled, her furious voice breaking the quiet atmosphere. "No, Alistair. Don't you dare walk away."

Alistair tried his best angry face. "I can't fight beside the one who got Duncan and all the Grey Wardens killed."

"Yes, you can, and you will," she retorted firmly. "You have a duty. You cannot abandon it now." It was as if Duncan's voice had joined with hers. He saw the truth in her words, clear as daylight, wise as experience. He could not run away. But he still wouldn't back down. He couldn't.

"What are we going to accomplish by agreeing to this?" he argued angrily.

"Alistair, we need all the help we can get."

That excuse again. She'd first used it to convince him that bringing Morrigan along was a good idea, and had used it for other recruitment opportunities for questionable companions. But this time he resisted. "That won't work here, Aetheria," he snapped. "Look at all we've done. Look at all _you've_ done. You think we really need another, after everything you've accomplished yourself?"

"I didn't do it alone," she hissed back, stepping forward with one foot so she was angled sideways but still looking at him. "I didn't do it with just skill, luck, and fate. I did it with help. And we aren't leaving the Blight in the hands of the only three Grey Wardens in Ferelden. You said it yourself. We need to rebuild."

The words echoed in his mind, bringing back the memory of when they'd first spoke of Duncan after Ostagar. He did say that, didn't he? His mind scrambled. He couldn't think of more arguments against it.

"Alistair," she said firmly, slicing through his cloud of thoughts. "We must gain all the allies we can possibly have. And I know it feels wrong, but if there is a chance that he'll help us, then I'll take it." She stepped closer and looked him in the eyes. "This is our duty as Grey Wardens. We must stop the Blight, no matter the cost."

The Grey Warden motto bounced into his head as he attempted to hold her fierce gaze, forcing himself to keep looking into her shining green eyes.

_In war, victory.  
__In peace, vigilance.  
__In death, sacrifice..._

He couldn't hold it for long. He sighed and looked away. "All right," he relented. "Fine."

He half expected her to smile, but she didn't. She turned to Loghain. "You will be inducted into the Grey Wardens, then."

"Thank you, Warden," Anora said gratefully. But even she flinched slightly when Aetheria turned her acidic gaze on her.

"There is still the matter of who will rule Ferelden," interjected Arl Eamon. "Has it been decided that Alistair will rule on his father's throne?"

"No one's decided that," said Alistair quickly. "Have they...?"

"He refuses the throne!" Anora exclaimed eagerly. "Everyone here has heard him. He abdicates the throne in favor of me."

"You are hardly the right person to mitigate this, Anora," said Eamon, turning to Aetheria. "Warden, will you assist us in this decision?"

Aetheria's face was hardened and tough. Alistair had never seen her so intense out of battle. Usually if she was angry, she got over it quickly enough. But there was unmistakable ferocity in her eyes, and in all honesty it scared him. "Yes," she said, "but first I need to speak to Alistair."

She asked him a couple questions, then asked Anora in turn. Without sparing a glance at Loghain, she stated, "I am ready to choose."

"Then who shall lead Ferelden, Warden?" Eamon asked as she walked to the front of the group. "Who will lead us through this Blight?"

She took a breath. "Alistair will be king," she announced.

Alistair felt his stomach flop. So he wasn't just going to be forced to fight alongside Loghain, he was also going to have to be king afterwards. Things were not going as he had hoped.

"And," she added suddenly, before Eamon could speak, "I will rule beside him."

Alistair nearly choked hearing her words. It ended up sounding like a strange cough. Once he'd steadied himself, he asked incredulously, "Really? You will?" He closed his eyes for a moment. "This is where I wake up, usually," he muttered. "Or everyone points and laughs because I have no clothes on."

This time she smiled – a tight, wry smile that twisted his heart. She wasn't enjoying this much, either, he guessed. Not only had she united Ferelden, she was faced with the burden of choosing its fate, as well. But the smile did say one thing for certain.

_Yes._

**~o~O~o~**

Loghain was in the study with Riordan. Aetheria lay on the bed in her room, lazily stroking her mabari's head. No one had dared come in, and other than the hound, she was alone, thinking to herself. The decision hadn't been easy, that was for sure. She knew Alistair might have to be restrained the next time they set up camp, and she desperately hoped that he'd be able to handle his emotions, though he never seemed very adept at it.

She closed her eyes, letting her mind drift like a paper boat in a pond. Was it wrong to deprive Alistair of his revenge? After all, she got to kill Arl Howe. Then again, she remembered, Howe wasn't very much liked anyway. And he was a lot sicker in the mind than Loghain. Loghain was just... paranoid, really. _I suppose I can't blame him_, she thought. _He was born when the Orlesians still controlled Ferelden... but so was my father_, she remembered suddenly. It seemed so strange that nearly one year after the attack on Highever, her parents already seemed so distant to her. Only now she realized that that was one thing her father could have understood about Loghain, if he was here to help her.

But now she was facing this without them.

She sighed and lay sprawled on the bed, ready to let sleep consume her.

A sudden knock on the door jolted her awake. She didn't even know if she'd fallen asleep.

She stood up and stretched a little before opening the door. Riordan stood there, a faint smile playing about his face. _This must be about Loghain_, she realized. Instantly the thought of his dying in the Joining became a hope, which she quickly blotted out of her mind. "Riordan?" she greeted.

He nodded in reply. "Loghain has survived the Joining. He is now a part of the Grey Wardens."

Aetheria tried her best to hide her disappointment. Alistair would not be happy with this at all. And she didn't need untrusting companions, not when they were so close to finishing this.

"Thank you for telling me," she answered simply. "What are you going to do now?"

Riordan outlined his plan to go down south to locate the archdemon. "It appears that the horde is poised to attack Redcliffe," he stated. "I'll head there too, to investigate."

"Luck be with you, then," she said. Riordan thanked her and walked away. As he did, she couldn't help but think of Alistair. Where did he go, exactly? He never said he was leaving, and if he had then surely he'd tell her first. He had stopped by after the Landsmeet when she told her companions what happened, and he spoke to her about kingship and their engagement and heirs. They didn't speak once of Loghain, but his hard eyes clearly showed that he greatly disapproved.

He couldn't leave now. But if that was true, then where was he?

She gathered her belongings and hoisted the backpack onto her shoulders, then moved from room to room signaling her companions to prepare to leave. She purposely left Anora's old room for last, because she knew he'd be there.

She stepped inside gingerly and forced herself to speak. "Loghain?" she said, her voice sounding weaker than usual. "Time to pack up. We're heading out."

He turned and fixed his gaze on her. She suppressed a shudder. His eyes were icy blue, but an aura of darkness radiated from them. Was he even happy with his chance to live, she wondered? Was he hoping to die somehow?

"Thank you, Warden," he answered, turning back to the bookshelf. Aetheria was tempted to ask "what for?" but quickly decided against it. She wanted to seem an able leader, for what it was worth. With her other friends, it hadn't been much of a problem. But with the end of the Blight approaching, it would be decidedly more difficult.

She walked slowly down the stone ramps and stairs that reminded her so much of Highever. Had Alistair been there, she would have gone on and on about it. But even now she was in no mood to talk. Arriving at the front door, she spotted all her companions standing around, talking to each other. Her heart sank in her chest as she realized Alistair wasn't among them.

She went up to Wynne. "Do you know where Alistair is?"

"I believe he went to camp," the healer answered. "Where we set up last time."

Aetheria was about to reply when she saw Wynne's face turn sour. She turned around.

Loghain walked up to the group as their chatter faded away. He nodded to her.

Aetheria adjusted the pack on her shoulders. "Let's get moving," she said, and opened the door.


	2. Coming To Terms

_**A/N:**__ Hi again! XP School is starting soon, so unfortunately updates are slooowwwinng doowwwnnnn... But anyway, thanks to everyone who's favorited or alerted! BioWare owns it all. (Mostly...?) Remember to reeevyeeeww!_

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**Chapter 2: Coming To Terms**

_"A man is made by the quality of his enemies."_

_- King Maric Theirin_

**~o~O~o~**

The sun had already set by the time they reached the bottom of the hill. Aetheria spared one more glance behind her at the capital of Ferelden, letting her gaze slide over its buildings and walls. She knew that she'd probably be living there for a while considering who she was engaged to.

They continued their trek through lush plains and fields that turned gold from the sun's weak light. The days had been warm, but they were slowly getting colder. Leaves were changing colors, complimenting the honey-yellow stalks of wheat and grass. Aetheria breathed in the scent of it: woodsy and natural, bringing back memories of days spent with Fergus among the trees in Highever...

"Aetheria?" Leliana's voice cut through her reverie. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, why-" she began, until she realized a tear had made its way halfway down her cheek. She brushed it aside hastily. "Yes, I was just... reminiscing."

Leliana smiled warmly at her. "If you need anything, I am here for you," she said, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Thank you, Leliana."

Darkness had fallen significantly by the time their old campsite came into view. Aetheria spotted the glow of the fire about forty paces ahead. "Go there," she ordered her mabari, Soren. "Make sure Alistair knows we're coming." He barked and sped forward. She didn't want him to be caught off guard.

A few minutes later when they entered the clearing, Soren bounded up to her, whimpering. "What is it, boy?" she asked uncertainly. After all, he knew and was used to Alistair by now. His whimpering couldn't mean anything good.

The hound made a small cry again, looking at the campsite. Aetheria glanced around, seeing why he was upset. Alistair wasn't here.

She groaned and put her hand on her face in exasperation. "Maker's breath, where is he?" She looked around some more. His tent was folded up in a pile next to his pack. _So he was here_, she thought. _But where is he now?_

The rest of the party filed into camp. As they began setting up their own tents, Aetheria realized that they'd forgotten to buy one for Loghain. She walked over to him. He was wandering around the fire with his hands behind his back. "Loghain," she said hesitantly.

He turned to her, giving her that same icy stare. "Yes?"

"I... realize that you don't have a tent," she said. "So... here." She handed him her own folded up tent. "You can use mine."

He took it nonchalantly. "And what of you?"

"I can bunk with someone else," she assured him.

He grunted in acceptance. She could have sworn she saw a twinkle in his eye. He knew very well who she'd spend the night with; after all, everyone had heard about the engagement. Either way, he had a tent now, but there was still the matter of finding Alistair. She dreaded bringing him back to camp, but she knew she'd have to. Alistair would have to face her decision, and it was now or never.

"Soren!" she called as soon as she reached the edge of camp. He ran eagerly towards her. She dug a wrinkled rag out of her pack and held it out to him. "Track this scent," she commanded. "Quickly!" He sniffed it, then smelled the air and barked, heading off into the woods around the camp. She followed closely behind him.

The path they took twisted between trees and rocks, stumps and boulders. The moon illuminated their trail, reminding her of the tales her mother had told her when she was still a child. A young maiden, making her way through the pale, moonlit forest, looking for respite from the wild creatures of the night... she had always loved those stories, but she never wanted to play the part of the damsel in distress. She wanted to be able to protect herself.

She felt another tear running down her cheek, and she brushed it away, chiding herself on being so softhearted when it came to her family.

Aetheria eventually heard the sound of swiftly running water, and Soren slowed to a trot. When they reached the river bank, they were greeted by the sight of a shirt lying on the ground along with Alistair's heavy silverite armor.

She held the rag out to Soren again and waited anxiously while he attempted to pick up the scent trail. He sniffed around a couple of large rocks and a log, then went to the edge of the rushing river. He seemed to want to head downriver, but stopped short, looking a little confused. _Damn,_ thought Aetheria. _The mist from the river must be covering up the scent._ She ushered the dog to follow her, then decided to trust his sense of direction and headed in the same way the water flowed.

Soon after, she spotted him. He was sitting in the grass on the bank, leaning back on a huge boulder. He was shirtless, and Aetheria couldn't help but let her eyes glide over the smooth curves of his muscles before walking into his sight. She stood over him with a small, sad smile, the kind of smile that could get her anything she wanted from him.

He looked up at her with pain in his eyes. Aetheria flinched when she saw it. "Alistair," she said.

"What do you want?" he asked quietly.

She sat down next to him. "I know this can't be easy-"

"'Can't be easy'?" he growled. "More than that. More like 'can't be possible.'"

She was starting to glare. Alistair braced himself. "Look, this is hard," she said, sighing. "More than hard, I know. And... and maybe you really don't like me now. Maybe you hate me after what I've done. But you're going to have to face this."

"Easy for you to say," he mumbled.

She turned and gripped his shoulders tightly, bringing her face close to his in a violent fashion. "Stop being a baby," she hissed fiercely. "We all have to do things we _hate_-" she practically spat that word "-but it doesn't stop us from doing what we must. Do you understand?"

Alistair had to admit it in his head: he was scared. Of her and what lay in store for them. He nodded timidly. He was used to showing weakness in front of her now.

Her eyes returned to a soft, sad gaze. "I'm sorry I have to... just... boss you around like this," she said. "But we have to do this." She sighed and sat next to him, leaning back on the same rock and smiling faintly. "My family... 'we always do our duty first,' as my father said." Her hand rose to grasp the amulet around her neck, the one given to her by the spirit in the Gauntlet. "That's exactly what he said to me before I... left." She stopped there, wiping away her tears.

Alistair stared at the river as its waters gushed forward. He didn't even look at her.

"We all have our own desires," continued Aetheria, "but we must come to terms with the fact that sometimes, our duty supercedes those desires." She glanced at him. He looked older, even defeated. His eyes were fixed on the rushing water. "Alistair, look at me," she demanded.

He didn't want to see her eyes again. That scorching look he'd gotten from her earlier made him afraid. But he had learned that she was right when she first said they had to turn around and face their fears. He gingerly turned his head towards her, expecting to feel pain at her expression.

Instead, he saw the countenance of a sad young woman who had lost everything she had ever known, looking at the person who made everything worth fighting for. Her verdant gaze was soft, and he couldn't turn away. He didn't want to.

"We have to go back to camp, Alistair," she said. "Promise me you won't go on a rampage when we get there."

He chuckled. She always did have a way of making him smile in their darkest hours. "Alright," he said, sighing. "I guess you got me there."

**~o~O~o~**

Most of their companions were in their tents by the time they returned. That included Loghain, apparently. It was clear to see where his tent was, too. It was close enough to the fire, but distanced from the others. Someone had generously put Alistair's tent up for him and it was situated on the edge of the semicircle formed by the other tents.

"Where-" Alistair began before getting cut off by Aetheria. She pointed at the tent that was hers before she gave it to Loghain.

"I let him use mine," she explained.

"Yes, but what about you?" he asked. Her smug face gave away the answer. "_Ohh._ I see."

They ate some of the bread and meat they'd gotten from Arl Eamon's estate and soon afterwards prepared for bed. Alistair got into the tent first. He was glad that Loghain's tent was clear on the other side of the campfire; he wanted to be away from that bastard for as long as possible before they set out in the morning.

He collapsed exhaustedly into his bedroll. Before long he realized that Aetheria must have lent Loghain her own bedroll as well. But that meant-

"Move over," Aetheria's voice sounded, piercing through the darkness. He felt her smooth skin against his as she slid in next to him.

"Are you sure about this?" he whispered, putting his arm around her.

"Why? You're not?" she asked, turning to look at him.

"It's just... I feel so... insecure, you know?" He swallowed. "This person we've been trying so hard to knock from power, to crumble... he's_ in camp_. In _our _camp."

"He wouldn't dare hurt us," she whispered back, flipping her whole body over so she was facing him. "He knows well enough now that the Blight is the top priority here. Orlais is just a close second."

He laughed softly. "And... his tent is that one, across the fire from us, right?"

"That's right."

"And who's in the tent next to ours?"

Aetheria thought for a moment. "Leliana," she answered. Then she added, "She's a sound sleeper."

"Good," he whispered. He kissed her lips and pulled her closer, slowly letting himself become lost inside her.


	3. Bad Company

_**A/N:**__ Wow. I've been working hard to straighten out these ideas... I haven't played much with Loghain in the party, but I tried to keep him in character nonetheless. I hope the title of the chapter isn't copyrighted or anything. Special shoutout to those who faved/alerted: Kukkaro, GriffinGuts, Seax, Starkiller720, RubyPele, Auranara, Asirus, EdenLake, Faylynn, maskedpainter, bioncafemme, fussycat, maha9957, Grannaah, LadyReeana, Harmakhis, and Sukauto Doragon. Thanks so much! (And sorry if I spelled your name wrong.) BioWare owns everything!_

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**Chapter 3: Bad Company**

_"She wields the broken sword, and separates true kings from tyrants."_

_- Archon Hessarian_

**~o~O~o~**

Alistair stretched and yawned as the first of the sun's rays seeped in through the cracks of the tent. He rubbed his eyes wearily, turning his head to the right.

She was still there, turned away from him but sleeping soundly, her pale skin glowing with health and loveliness. He stroked her bare shoulder, moving his hand slowly down her arm and listening to her faint, steady breathing. He was lucky to have her. And after hearing what she had to say at the Landsmeet, he found himself glad that he hadn't walked out. She was going to be his wife, and he felt that he didn't want anything else more in the world.

His mind fell to Loghain again. Loghain plagued his thoughts constantly; even in his dreams the sight of him marching off with his forces while the rest of the Grey Wardens became hopelessly outnumbered... he shook his head. That was in the past. He still couldn't get over it, though. And now that traitor who practically killed Duncan was in their camp, kept alive by the mercy of the woman he loved.

Blinking back a few tears, he sat up and sighed. She _knew_ he wanted him dead. But why would she allow him into their ranks? Perhaps Riordan's advice that they could use him convinced her to do just that. But even after the Blight was done, he would still be a Grey Warden. And they'd still be... _brothers._

He slowly dressed himself, careful not to let the metal armor clash against itself lest it wake her up. Once he was sure it was on correctly and no hair on his head was out of place, he stepped outside into the crisp morning air.

"Ah, Alistair," a rough voice said. "Just the man I was hoping to see."

He glanced up. Loghain was looking back at him, a small, emotionless smile on his face. "What do you want?" he growled, not hesitating to scowl.

"No need to be so tense," he chuckled darkly. "I merely wanted to ask you something."

Alistair narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "What?"

"It's about... the dreams."

_Oh, right. I guess Riordan didn't tell him much about the consequences of the Joining_, Alistair thought. "Yes, that's what happens after you submit yourself to the taint," he answered lamely.

"The dragon. That is the archdemon, is it not?" asked Loghain.

"Yes," Alistair replied exasperatedly.

"Can you... understand it?"

Alistair arched an eyebrow at the question. "No," he said, shaking his head a little. "Why? Can you?"

Loghain chuckled again, humorlessly. "No. I was simply wondering."

"Really?" Alistair retorted, a perfect comeback forming in his mind. "I would have thought that of all people you'd understand it, seeing as you're both _monsters_." He reveled in the insult, a feeling that he couldn't resist, but the guilt landed with a heavy thud in his heart.

Loghain frowned and seemed about to say something when another voice streamed through the air. "Good morning!" sang Leliana, emerging from her tent and smiling warmly. "How is everyone?"

It was her turn to frown as she saw that the only two people up were Alistair and Loghain, and the very air around them was charged with hostility. Alistair was glaring at the other man, who was doing the same in return. Leliana wished she hadn't come out when she did. She was only concerned with the Blight for now, and didn't know much about this whole mess with Loghain and Anora. She only knew that the man had betrayed the Grey Wardens somehow, and was now a Grey Warden himself, much to Alistair's chagrin.

The silence continued as if she hadn't said anything. Leliana glanced around hurriedly, looking for something to do to get her away from this inhospitable quiet.

As if reading her mind, Soren suddenly barked, making her jump. He ran up to her and wagged his tail eagerly as she patted his head. "Go wake Aetheria," she told him quietly. He panted and ran to Alistair's tent, poking his head inside. She followed, glad to not become involved between the two angry male Wardens.

"...Huh? Oh, Soren." Leliana heard his mistress yawn. "Hey, boy. What are you do– hey! You silly dog!" A peal of laughter rang out from the tent. It seemed to do the trick. Alistair stood up and began digging food out of a pack. Loghain bent down and tended to the fire. They ignored each other almost completely, only sparing the occasional infuriated glance.

"Aetheria?" Leliana asked outside the tent. "Can I... come in? I need to talk to you."

"Just one moment," she replied. "Armor..."

As soon as she had most of her dragonskin armor on, she ushered Leliana inside. "What is it?"

"Those two," said Leliana. "Are you sure it's a good idea to bring _both_ of them? They don't like each other very much."

"Is that an understatement?" Aetheria asked, the smile on her face overshadowed with anxiety.

"Yes. Definitely an understatement," she answered.

"Well," started Aetheria, "they're both Grey Wardens. We share the same goals, and Ferelden will meet its doom if we don't work together." She sighed. "Hopefully they will have enough sense not to lunge at each other's throats before this whole thing is over."

Leliana nodded in silent prayer. _Hopefully..._

**~o~O~o~**

"If you keep glaring at me like that, your face might remain so, and you'll be stuck glaring at other people for the rest of your life."

"Oh? I think I'd be okay with it only if I had to keep looking at you for the rest of my short little life."

They were at it again. It made the journey even more unbearable. The rain made everyone miserable, Aetheria knew that, and now there was so much tension between her fellow Wardens that it was almost tangible. The intensity seemed to zap her occasionally, sending small shivers down her spine. She recognized the feeling. It usually happened when her parents used to fight. The shouting and yelling would reverberate on the castle walls, and everyone could hear the anger, even if they couldn't really hear what they were saying. She remembered being so upset once, when she was still very young, that she had climbed to the roof and wouldn't come down until they met her ultimatum: they had to apologize to each other and make up. But both Teryn and Teryna Cousland were headstrong and stubborn, and they wouldn't back down. They cleverly forced her to come down by playing on her appetite. Aetheria hadn't been happy to lose their little game of wit to a bodily function, but since then she'd always been wily enough not to be embarrassed in that way again.

She caught another tear at the corner of her eye and blinked it back, quietly cursing her weakness. It had only been about a year, and the wound was still healing. The loss was a raw, empty hole in her heart, and the only thing that came anywhere close to making her whole again was Alistair...

Loghain's sigh brought her back to the present. "I hope you're happy with yourself, _your Majesty_," he muttered, almost accusingly.

"Not quite yet," grumbled Alistair.

"Would you two quit it?" Aetheria snapped, her patience wearing down. "Everything here is bad as it is: we're cold and wet, and the Blight is upon us, and we have to get ready to fight the growing darkspawn horde and the archdemon. So can you both just _shut up_?"

Alistair made his upset pouty face while Loghain simply looked away. This definitely wasn't going to be easy.

At last the rain slowed to a mist and they reached the outskirts of the Brecilian Forest. Aetheria followed the familiar path into the Dalish camp. "Why are we here?" Alistair asked her.

"We'll need a lot of supplies for the coming battle," she replied. "So we're buying elfroot for poultices." Then she added, "I'll only need a couple people to come with me."

Alistair couldn't help but cross his fingers. _Please let me come_, he hoped. _Please choose me..._

"Morrigan, Zevran..." she pondered, "...and... Soren." The mabari barked happily as Morrigan and Zevran filed in behind her.

"What? I don't get to come with you?" Alistair complained.

"That's right," she answered.

"Why not?"

"We're going to have to work together," said Aetheria. "And I want you and Loghain to be able to be near each other without one of you ending up seriously injured."

"Or dead," he added mischievously.

She glared. "Just try not to kill each other while I'm gone."

"Alright, fine," sighed Alistair. "I'll try my best."

Aetheria smiled at him. "I won't be long." She turned and walked up a small incline to the ruined archway that signified the entrance to the Dalish camp with Morrigan, Zevran, and Soren, leaving Alistair with Leliana, Sten, Oghren, Wynne, and Loghain.

Almost immediately after she and her companions disappeared over the hill, Loghain turned to him. "Do you _really_ hate me?" he asked, as if it were a joke.

"You have to ask?" Alistair scoffed.

Loghain furrowed his brow. "I am a Grey Warden now," he said. "Whether you like it or not, I am your brother-in-arms. And with our situation, I do not think it's a good time for us to hate each other."

"This entire situation wouldn't have even happened if you had flanked the darkspawn when you were supposed to!" hissed Alistair, finding himself furious. He tried to contain his anger, to no avail. "You're the reason why we have to fight through all this! You're the reason why all the rest of the Grey Wardens are dead, and the why the king is dead, and why Duncan is dead, and... and why..." His voice cracked and rose in pitch, and tears stung his eyes. "It's all because of _you_..."

"Alistair," interjected Wynne. She pulled him aside. "Alistair, you must stop this now."

He sniffed quietly. "I... I'm sorry... I need some time."

"Go, then," she said reassuringly. "I'll fetch you when she comes back." As Alistair shuffled into the cover of the thick forest, Wynne faced Loghain. "The topic is sensitive to him. I suggest you do not bring it up again."

Loghain shrugged. "He has yet to become a true man. Life isn't fair. He must learn these harsh lessons sooner or later."

"Now is a difficult time for him," Wynne replied sternly. "I know how he feels. I saw you withdraw at Ostagar."

Loghain froze for an instant. So she was there, was she? "Perhaps you are in need of those lessons as well," he said, narrowing his eyes.

Wynne glared back fiercely. "Unfairness does not mean abandoning your _king_!"

Before anyone could say anything more, Aetheria stepped in. "That's quite enough," she said, letting her gaze piece through each of her arguing companions' visual defenses. Wynne looked away from the stare of this competent young woman. As the eldest of the group, Wynne knew she should not succumb to these destructive emotions... and yet it was so hard. She truly understood Alistair's pain. How could this ruthless, traitorous former hero be allowed to live?

"Where is Alistair?" Aetheria asked, tearing Wynne from her thoughts.

"He went right down there," she replied, pointing down into a small ravine. "I can fetch him now, if you wish."

"No, I will. Just... don't talk anymore. I don't want to hear a single word until I get back. No more fighting."

Wynne nodded solemnly. Aetheria jumped down the slope into the ravine and walked along, enjoying the smells of the forest.

"Oh, hey, you're back!" An excited voice greeted from right behind her. She yelped and spun around, connecting her hand to his face.

"Ow!" Alistair rubbed his cheek. "I can see why I thought sneaking up on you was a bad idea."

Aetheria frowned. "It could have been a lot worse. Trust me."

"Oh, I trust _you_, all right," he replied mockingly.

"Are you okay?" she asked, ignoring his tone. "When I got back, Wynne and Loghain were the ones shouting."

She saw the slightest bit of frustration flash in his eyes. "Yes, everything's fine," he answered. "Things are a little tough."

"I'm sorry I have to put you through this. But I've already explained my reasons to you, haven't I?"

Alistair thought back to last night. "Yes, I guess you did at that."

"Then let's get moving." She made her way up the slope. Alistair followed closely behind, preparing himself so he wouldn't lunge at Loghain the next time he saw him. His willpower was only so strong, though. He wondered how long he could last before this was finally over.

He shook his head. The fate of Ferelden depended on them. Aetheria depended on him. And he would not let them down.


End file.
